My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Can you bring me the toilet please
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
i think im in europe. pls send help
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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