I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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