i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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