I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
not ubering you a puppy
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
