Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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