Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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