There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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