the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I cannot find my penis.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Randomize
