I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I have so many feelings about this burrito
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