Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
