I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Hippo gnu deer
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
