Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
you never un-have a 4some
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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