I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
