i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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