I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize