you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize