How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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