I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
His hands were made for my vagina.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
