the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
