I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looked like the before picture.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize