I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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