You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
