If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
