the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
