I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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