problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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