I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
