it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I have fence marks all over my body
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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