2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
