Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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