If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
