I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm like, not good at living.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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