What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
