My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
