FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I didn't notice because vodka
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
i think im in europe. pls send help
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
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