Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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