So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
