Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
