I don't think brook has ever known best
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
