U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
