fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
