The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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