I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
All the doctor said was why
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
