So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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