Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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