it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
