Sry I called you an 8
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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