Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
