I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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