is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
